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Have you ever found yourself restless - not in and of itself a bad thing... or is it?
I mean, not restless - in an anxious way - as if everything is about to come falling down. Just restless. Like there is something more out there that you are missing. Something important that you are supposed to be doing, but aren't. I found myself in a restless state today.
My heart is at peace. And yet, my mind is convinced that something is missing. I believe with all of my heart in the abundance of God. I also believe that sometimes we miss the abundance because we get caught up in the dailies of life. God is in all of the dailies... but there is more. There is that conversation that you won't even remember later that has the potential to change the course of someone's week - or more! There is the two minutes you took to do something nice for someone who had just come to the conclusion that people just don't care anymore. Every action - every single one of them has an effect on other people around you.
Tonight my son broke a piece of glass. A very large piece of glass over the nicest picture frame in my house. At first, I was just angry (he was supposed to be in bed, and he was horsing around). Then, I was just sad. We cannot replace it. Those precious pictures... that beautiful frame will not be hung anytime in the near future. Sadness. Then, I realized - as he came down the stairs (again) crying and saying, "I'm sorry momma" - I had a choice. I could reveal my anger, my sadness... or I could offer forgiveness and grace. I could help him rest easy knowing that the stupid glass doesn't change my love for him one iota. Not one.
I won't say it was easy to offer that grace. I was still upset with him. He has been increasingly disobedient and his sin is beginning to affect more and more people. Yuck. But, today, I remember how many times I have sinned - just this very day - and I am reminded of a grace that far exceeds my own. And, I am thankful for that Grace, and it is easier to extend forgiveness in light of that.
Today was a restless day for me. It was a day that was hard to discern. It was hard to know what were my thoughts, and my plans, and what was the leading of the One who whispers to me and sings over me. It was a day that I felt like I was missing out on something. I don't like that feeling. But, I am restless until I rest in Him. What I wouldn't give to have a few days of quiet with Him alone.
God is my ever present help in times of trouble. He is my rest. I spent time quietly with Him this morning. I have had time with Him this evening. I am praying that there is not something He is asking - calling me to that I am saying no to. He is the only answer to the restlessness inside of me.
Now, it is time for this restless lady to rest - fully in Him - as He sings me to sleep.
I mean, not restless - in an anxious way - as if everything is about to come falling down. Just restless. Like there is something more out there that you are missing. Something important that you are supposed to be doing, but aren't. I found myself in a restless state today.
My heart is at peace. And yet, my mind is convinced that something is missing. I believe with all of my heart in the abundance of God. I also believe that sometimes we miss the abundance because we get caught up in the dailies of life. God is in all of the dailies... but there is more. There is that conversation that you won't even remember later that has the potential to change the course of someone's week - or more! There is the two minutes you took to do something nice for someone who had just come to the conclusion that people just don't care anymore. Every action - every single one of them has an effect on other people around you.
I won't say it was easy to offer that grace. I was still upset with him. He has been increasingly disobedient and his sin is beginning to affect more and more people. Yuck. But, today, I remember how many times I have sinned - just this very day - and I am reminded of a grace that far exceeds my own. And, I am thankful for that Grace, and it is easier to extend forgiveness in light of that.
Today was a restless day for me. It was a day that was hard to discern. It was hard to know what were my thoughts, and my plans, and what was the leading of the One who whispers to me and sings over me. It was a day that I felt like I was missing out on something. I don't like that feeling. But, I am restless until I rest in Him. What I wouldn't give to have a few days of quiet with Him alone.
God is my ever present help in times of trouble. He is my rest. I spent time quietly with Him this morning. I have had time with Him this evening. I am praying that there is not something He is asking - calling me to that I am saying no to. He is the only answer to the restlessness inside of me.
Now, it is time for this restless lady to rest - fully in Him - as He sings me to sleep.
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